Marriage and the Man Cave

It’s safe to say that after 22 years of marriage, things have come full circle. Our new, deeper level of intimacy and love can be summed up in two words: Man Cave.

NB's man cave

At first glance, the pros in Vegas would have called us a long shot. Picture my nightstand with a book tower from Smiley to Mosley and then picture Mr. UnHollywood’s nightstand with…the clicker. Books are like good friends I can’t wait to see and sports are like Mr. UnHollywood’s buddies who have stories of their own. Unfortunately, the two passions don’t always mesh.

“Can you turn it down a little, my love?” I ask after reading the same paragraph three times over Chris Berman’s annoying homerun call. Back, back, back, back…Gone!

Then there are nights when I can’t put my book down and suddenly I hear Mr. UnHollywood groan, “How much longer? I need to get to sleep.”

Marriage requires compromise and that’s how we came up with the Man Cave. Marni Belsome, our interior designer, achieved a ying-yang of a double-duty space to look oh-so-right.

The faded second-hand furniture that made perfect sense when the kids squeezed juice boxes and spilled Goldfish has been replaced with a sleek outdoor fabric-covered mega-sofa where Mr. UnHollywood’s pals can kick back. My books now rest on gorgeous bookshelves created by Rick and Josh Braun of Cabinets Unlimited. A double-sided fireplace connects my library to the Man Cave.

Bon Jour Cozy Study for Reading and Writing

Bon Jour Cozy Study for Reading and Writing


This virtual stadium sports a 70” TV (yes, bigger is better according to every male who’s seen it) where Tiger Woods, Kobe Bryant and Matt Kemp swing, shoot and score so Mr. UnHollywood and his buddies can laugh, groan and high-five depending on who has what player on their fantasy league roster. The room is so inviting that I often visit ‘his’ side of the pool house to snuggle and commiserate over Kobe’s ruptured Achilles or celebrate the Yankees latest win.

Yesterday, Marni and I went on a hunt for a few final touches.

We bagged a trophy at Modern Rugs LA perfect for setting your feet on for the Big Game.

Mid-Century ottoman perfect for kicking back.

Mid-Century ottoman perfect for kicking back.


Wouldn’t you know it? Owner Sasha Masjedi is a fellow BHHS grad.

Eye for style on rugs and one-of-a-kind pieces.

Eye for style on rugs and one-of-a-kind pieces.

Sometimes all it takes to work out a marital impasse is a pleasing change of scenery.


MARNI Interior Design                                                                         Marni@MARNIInteriorDesign                                                                                                 310-666-9027

Modern Rugs, LA                                                                                                                      310-855-1003

Kreiss                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        310-657-3990



Author Description

Cynthia Baseman

Cynthia Baseman is the author of 'Love, Mom: A Mother's Journey from Loss to Hope.' She writes about motherhood, the environment and education.

There are 10 comments. Add yours

  1. 22nd April 2013 | Jim bennett says: Reply
    I like the unhollywood side best. Guys more practical. Got that from Carnagie book on winning friends. :))
  2. 15th April 2013 | ellen says: Reply
    it looks great from way out east, enjoy your spaces!
  3. 15th April 2013 | Marjorie Bard says: Reply
    I like neatness also, but it isn't working! I have piles of books, notes, and mss everywhere, bookcases overflowing, and every room looks a bit like that TV show about "hoarders." I'm not one, but just my computer room alone stunned a technician who took too many "looks" at me to see if I am really sane. He went to find some wires, and gently pushed against a sideboard and a pile of pages from a sitcom pilot scattered around the room. It didn't help that I had the A/C on; I may never get the unnumbered pages in order -- notes on separate pages interrupting what should make sense just by the reading. I have the only abnormal house in this tiny rural town. Everyone else's house is neat, no matter how they live and the number of playing animals (and a few with young children). When I lived in BH for 50 years, somehow it had some sort of order. I wonder if being "rural" now has made me feel "farmer-ish" and living as a new frontier woman who had no sense of style (since there was no need). Or, maybe I've finally found my true nature: free of housework and needing to just toss things into piles. In any case, your house is lovely, and I can just remember how I lived in BH: like a normal person. One advantage of old age is not caring what others think anymore. But, I don't invite anyone in, so I must be embarrassed!
    • 15th April 2013 | Cynthia Baseman says: Reply
      Your pioneer spirit looks awfully good from here. I think one of the reasons I am so organized is because I tend to say'yes' to a lot of volunteer projects and my piles would grow exponentially if I didn't tame them by filing and culling the 'herd' of paper from them and from my day job(not blogging you could guess). Your image of the sitcom pilot blowing around the room is hilarious. Maybe YOU should start a blog @ Marjorie.
  4. 15th April 2013 | Mamacita says: Reply
    What a beautiful and relaxing hideaway.No one could complain in this peaceful sanctuary. Step inside that room, close your eyes and you are in Shangri La of Lost Horizon. James Hilton could not do better.
    • 15th April 2013 | Cynthia Baseman says: Reply
      So glad you like it, too. Being that you're BH Mom's Mamacita and all...
  5. 15th April 2013 | Carpool Goddess says: Reply
    I can't get over how clean your desk is! Please tell me you tidied up before this photo was taken :)
    • 15th April 2013 | Cynthia Baseman says: Reply
      I'm one of those people who can't work unless my desk is neat. Deep down it's just a big procrastination move on my part.
  6. 15th April 2013 | Hayley Kaplan says: Reply
    Love how it turned out! When's the party to break it in? ;)

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